Just plain folks tend to think that bikers dress the same – denim, boots, leather and black.
But to the discerning eye, biker apparel falls into distinctly different categories, from the sexy to the sinister.
And like any good festival, Thunder in the Valley has them all.
I started with a tour of the Mega-Mall building on Main Street, where official Thunder merchandise is sold, such as T-shirts with spangled symbols of Johnstown’s Inclined Plane.
For women, tight T-shirts with plunging V-necklines can be had in any color, with “Thunder in the Valley” written in sequins at just the right place across the front.
But merchandising to hundreds of thousands of bikers at rallies coast-to-coast takes skill, the vendors said.
“In Texas, it’s chaps all day long. That’s what you sell,” said one.
“But in New Hampshire, almost all I sold were rain suits. That’s just how it is.”
And while bikers may like to project an outsider-rebel image, biker fashions for sale at Thunder mirror the same spring style trends in women’s fashion magazines.
(For those who don’t partake, this spring’s look is bright colors paired with other bright colors, plus a neutral such as black, khaki or white. It’s like, well, so simple.)
And there they were at Thunder – sleeveless shirts, with fringe where the sleeves were torn out, in those now-hues of purple, orange and red.
If you want that biker aura with your style, some shirts bore an outlaw message, such as “Welcome to America, now speak English.”
On the streets, bikers strutted their styles, such as these:
n Bad Boy Sexy.
For this, tight jeans and an earring take second place to the shirt, preferably black, with the picture of a Playboy bunny-type girl and slogans such as “Ride it hot” or “Ride it like you stole it.”
Usually single, usually looking for love.
n The Evil One.
These guys like skimpy leather vests, some with a skull and crossbones on the back and black T-shirts with dead people’s faces or skulls. Black do-rags and tattoos complete the look.
Usually married.
n Same Ol’, Same Ol’.
A variation on the Evil One, but with faded jeans, scuffed boots, black-faded-to-gray T-shirts, military tattoos and bandanna do-rags.
For the short man, all black and straight-legged faded jeans give a squarish shape that can effectively distract the eye from a beer belly.
Usually married with kids and a mortgage.
n The Super-Bad Prisoner.
Any basic biker outfit, but with accessories such as fingerless leather driving gloves, studs or earrings in strange places, tattooed necklines and heavy metal bracelets.
Usually a former gang member who’s been in prison, is headed for prison, or an accountant who has fantasies about all of the above.
n The Teddy Bear.
Silver or salt-and-pepper gray hair, with shaggy beard and twinkly eyes. Lots of denim and lots of belly.
Usually looks like a sweetie, and usually is one.
And for the women – those biker babes, biker mamas, or just young adventurers who wanna drive what men drive – anything is possible.
Thunder’s Mega-Mall featured lots of bra-style tops, in any color, with sequins and fringe in front and nothing but a tiny string tie in the back.
The clerk said it was a hot seller with men who wanted gifts for their ladies.
Hmmm ... thought so.
So what’s a good rally without a costume party or two?
Also available at Thunder this year were authentic American Indian tribal biker gear – soft leather pants and jackets with fringe and turquoise-colored beading.
Made in Pakistan.
Start planning now for next year’s show.
Susan Evans is a reporter for The Tribune-Democrat.
